So, it's the day of the shower & I stayed in bed until 10:00am thinking about it. I want to support my friend, but it's so hard for me to think about going & having people I don't know ask if I have kids, etc. Do I say, yes actually I did have a son, he didn't make it past 18 weeks gestation, or do I say, the polite thing, which is no, I don't? Ugh, I don't know what to do. I am leaning towards not going to spare myself the pain, but is it right to do that to my friend? I already got & wrapped all of her gifts, but I could just bring them to her house one night this week. Why is life so hard? I know my situation could be worse, but I'm not sure how I'm supposed to act? I feel like people who haven't walked in my shoes have no clue how much this sucks. Breathe, it's all going to be O.K., I am going to drop my gift off at her house & be at peace with skipping this event.
I wish life were easier, as I am sure all of you do as well...................
Do I open the China Adoption paperwork I received in the mail yesterday, or do I hold out hope for the FET transfer? When I think about it I have hope it will work, it did before, right??? When we were at Target the other night my Husband & I saw these two cute little girls, he said, I hope we have that someday. They were little blond girls. Can a girl dare to dream? It breaks my heart when he says stuff like that. It's physically my problem, but I can't do anything about it? God, help me... reveal your plan for me. Is that too much to ask for? At this point I just want a baby, I know I will be a great Mom & my Husband a great father, now we just need directions on how to get there.
Will the FET transfer be a success? I am on my knees, please let this work.
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3 comments:
I am so sorry you are here. I think you made the right decision to stay home. If your friend is a real friend she will completely understand.
I will pray God shows you His perfect plan! I would love to see His plan for me too. HUGS!
Your friend will completely understand, and I'm sure you're better off not putting yourself through that pain.
You wanna talk adoption, email me. What agency is that China program through? I was told China has a 2+ year wait ... ugh!
Don't feel bad about it, I'd do the same. Friends will understand.
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