Monday, May 21, 2007

Hurting...

My Husband & I met with my Nurse Practitioner today. She is a wonderful, kind woman & cried right along with both of us. It made me feel so much better to talk with her & she let me know what I could expect with everything. She said normally with pregnancies that have low fluid the baby doesn't go much past 25 weeks or so, so she said I can come in & hear the heart tones as much as I like, so we know if the baby is still with us. I decided that once a week will be my comfort level & we can go from there. She said once the baby passes they will induce me & I will deliver the baby. She said they can do a D&C, but we wouldn't be able to see the baby & she said I think you should hold your baby & let him/her know how much you love them. She said we will be able to hold the baby as long as we like & we can make arrangements before of after for her/him. She thinks it's a girl & so did the Perinatal Specialist, so hopefully we will be able to find out for sure when we go back for our follow up U/S in two weeks. We got to hear the heartbeat today (152) & it was so bittersweet. I can't believe that I finally made it to this point & now I am going to lose my so longed for baby. It's going to be difficult going through the upcoming weeks, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I think the reality of everything finally hit home with my Husband today, he was very emotional at the appointment & it's hard to see him hurting like that. I know that we will get through this & that someday we will get our baby to bring home. I keep praying to God that I can't take much more, so can this please be it for a while. Hopefully, he is listening.
More later.........

18 comments:

Carol said...

My heart just aches for you. I can't believe this is happening. Sending you big, big virtual hugs.

Hopeful Mother said...

I am just so sorry for what you are going through. I will be praying for peace and comfort for you and your husband. Please know that we are thinking of you.

Bumble said...

Jen, I'm so sorry. You've been through so much already I wish things were different. I'm going to be praying and thinking for you and your husband, and wishing for a miracle. I'm so sorry hun x

Laura, the (reluctant) baroness said...

I just found your site today. I had to tell you I am incredibly sorry for all of this. It is cruel. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you don't mind if I check in on you. Hang in there!

Nicole said...

I am so very very sorry. I just surfed over here from someone else's blog and my heart is breaking for you. Please know that you are in my thoughts.

Baby Blues said...

I'm so sorry Jen. I'm hurting with you. I don't know what to say but just know that you're in my prayers. May God give you the strength to go through this.

Susan said...

Thinking of you...

Heather said...

I'm so sorry; I can't believe that you're going through this. Please let me know if I can help in any way. Praying for you ...

Stephanie said...

Oh my god, Jen! I have been absent as of late and I just caught up on your blog. I am so sorry...gosh, that doesn't even sound like the right thing to say. my heart is hurting for you my friend.
Steph

Baby Blues said...

I've been thinking about you.

Hugs.

Nearlydawn said...

Jen, my heart goes out to you. I don't know what else to say. I just hurt for you. I will say a prayer for you, your hubby, and your little one tonight.

My Reality said...

I am so sorry for what you and your husband are dealing with. My thoughts are with all three of you.

Cibele said...

Hi Jen, that is my first time here at your blog and my heart aches for you right now. I am so very sorry. I'll be also praying for peace and comfort for you and your husband.
Sending you lots of virtual hugs

Cibele said...

Hi Jen, that is my first time here at your blog and my heart aches for you right now. I am so very sorry. I'll be also praying for peace and comfort for you and your husband.
Sending you lots of virtual hugs

Gil said...

I came from Baby Blues' blog and I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and praying for you and your husband.

Alice said...

Thinking of you. I am so very sorry.

Samantha said...

I'm so sorry.

Tam said...

Hi, also came this way via baby blues and just wanted to say that I am so sorry. Wishing you all the best and praying for strength for you.